Questions for God

So I read most of these in a book ("A Little Bit Wicked: Life, Love and Faith in Stages" by Kristin Chenoweth) and they made me laugh. And I don't feel like getting all deep and philisophical (that's spelled wrong...) to continue with the song lyrics tonight because I'm inexplicably tired (took a kick-butt 2 hours nap today. It was heavenly.) It sounds like something me and Jenny would make a list of. It's a list of questions to ask God when I meet Him: (I'm leaving some of hers out and adding some of my own. Feel free to comment with your own.)

1) Who killed JonBenet? And does she pretty much own the pageant circuit up here?

2) Did Marilyn kill herself or was it a Kennedy?

3) Did Lee Harvey Oswald really act alone?

4) Why is forgiveness so dang hard?

5) Why is slapstick so dang funny?

6) Who is the sadistic genius behind cellulite? Lord, please tell me you did not have anything to do with that.

7) What if you made it so that hate would cause hemorrhoids? Just an idea.

8) Did you really know that was going to happen? Did it make you laugh when you thought of that?

9) Why are stupid people so bound and determined to break into my Scooters? Twice in one weekend? Seriously?? Tell me the truth...was it someone from Starbucks? Or maybe some disgruntled Crane coffee peeps? (haha...at first I accidentally typed poops. shut up...I live with 3 young children. And Tim. And Mindy, for that matter. I think poop is funny now. And I am not ashamed.)

toooooo tired to finish....more to come. Or some more lyric interpretation tomorrow. whatev.

Peace