The Young and the Restless

I am restless.

I can't wait for school to start.

That's all I have going on right now, so this is as updated as it gets. =)

I hate titling these.

Thanks Andrew :) You win the prize. And if there was an actual physical prize, I'd give it to you. But, alas, I am a poor college student with debt up the yin-yang. Yet I still find time to blog in between my job and babysitting and all the other things that poor college students with jobs do. So really...you should be giving me the prize. (Gimme props for that turn-around. You're impressed.) (Who am I talking to?)

Tomorrow is my last day of babysitting for the family that I have been babysitting for the last two weeks. I'm not naming any names, but I will tell you that I am looking forward to being done. The extra cash is nice though. But I'd rather have that 3 hours of my day back. These last two weeks have reminded me why I quit nannying. No further comment. I'm sure the kids of the two sets of parents I'm thinking of will turn out just fine...

Sooo...no then?

So either no one tried to comment or it's not fixed. I'm not sure. But until someone tells me, then I'm sorry, I'm not gonna try to fix it anymore.  :)

-School starts in less than a month.

-My favorite shoes have a hole in them. They were $48. And if I want to get another pair, that means another $48. That's a lot of dollars.

-I have been very bothered lately. Don't know why or how to describe it other than that. Just very...irritated? Like, I wanna go into the middle of a wide open field and just yell at the top of my lungs for an extended amount of time. Or beat the crap out of someone. (Without actually hurting them, of course)

-I get to babysit my favorite kiddos tomorrow evening-Thursday morning. That's always a good time. If I'm ever in a funk, they pull me out of it real fast. So it's good to know that for 12+ hours I will be funk-free. :)

-I get to work tomorrow with some pretty cool people. I like that I can say that (almost) every shift I have. It's cool to get along so well with the people I work with. I can honestly say I have never actually been FRIENDS with coworkers before now. Except Valentino's in Norfolk, but those were existing friends and that was WHY I got the job in the first place.

-I bought some really good new music on iTunes today. Good music is wonderful. I love it when I hear a new song that I can listen to over and over again without getting sick of it.

-I decided that I need to learn how to let go of some things. I hang on to stuff pretty tight. That's why I journal. I'm like the opposite of the person who wears their heart on their sleeve. Neither one is good.

-I'm thinking about getting a second job. I'm waiting until school starts so I know what my work schedule will look like so I know what hours I will have available. But I really want to make some good payments on my student loans. I don't want to be paying  off loans forever. That's one of the reasons I want to be a doctor. So that, not only will it be feasible for me to get my loans paid off in my lifetime, but also so I can get them paid off and still have time to go on medical missions trips to Africa and support myself. (Ultimate Goal.)

That's my update. Isn't my life interesting? (that was sarcastic)

Comments

I think I fixed the comments thing so that anyone can comment. Until you do, we'll never know.

What Do I Know? Part Two

What do I know of You, who spoke me into motion?

Where have I even stood, but the shore along Your ocean?

Are You fire? Are You fury?

Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?

What do I know?

What do I know of Holy?

I guess I thought that I had figured You out.

I knew all the stories, and I learned to talk about

how You were mighty to save.

But those were only empty words on a page.

Then I caught a glimpse of who You might be.

The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees.

God spoke me into being. He calls Himself, "I Am." There are so many different ways to interpret that. He is fire and fury, sacred and beautiful. How on this Earth should I know what "Holy" means? I don't even know what His name means. I cannot fathom a being that can say "Light" and there is light. Except Harry Potter. But that's just a tiny bit of light on the end of a wand. God doesn't have a wand. Not to say He couldn't have one if He wanted one...but I digress.

I have always wanted to use that phrase. But I digress. Again.

Ha

Anyways...back to the point: my point is, I don't know. And neither do you. There is no way for us to wrap our minds around something so great that even just it's name can be interpreted an infinite number of ways. 

Think about this...if you're a Christian...if you're name is in the Book of Life...you are already in heaven. That means that for all you know you could be partying up there right now. That means that those we know who have already died don't have time to miss us...because we are already there. Time means absolutely nothing in heaven.

Time as we know it was created by man. God is on a whole different kind of clock. The proof of that is the fact that we have free will. God has a plan for us. But we can choose to do whatever we want. But He has a plan. But we can differ from the plan. But that's in His plan too. He knows what we are going to do before we do it but there is still the chance that we might change our minds and but He will meet us at the end of whatever path we decide to choose. Even if you take the right one and then hang a U-ey at  the tree of life and cut across the ditch and then turn around again and...yeah. He's already there. Cuz He knows. He planned it. He planned for your plan. I'm trying (to no avail) to make this make sense. BUT IT DOESN'T. BECAUSE I DON'T GET IT. And I never will. And honestly, I don't want to. Can you imagine the headache? Ugh.

And as for the last part of that song...have you ever caught a glimpse? Sometimes when I think about something...there are a few things that stand out..., it takes my breath away at how perfectly planned out it was. Things that I am not even going to try to explain because they won't make sense to anyone else. But even those tiny little things that happen, that take my breath away and that bring me to my knees...even those times that I have experienced what I can only describe as God doing His thing in my life...even though I EXPERIENCED it...I still feel like I don't get it. What do I know of Holy?

Daily Grind

I yawned the day before yesterday and my jaw ground (grinded?) It hurt real bad. Yesterday I could only open my mouth a few centimeters. Today I can go a little wider, but it hurts. And chewing is my least favorite thing to do right now. Thank the Lord for mashed potatoes and for Mindy who makes awesome ones. :)

That's all for now. I gotta research some schools for their pre-med programs. :) My next post will be more on the song I was dissecting. 

Later,

Kait

Reality Check

I went to Metro today to pay for my two summer classes. Kind of nerve-wracking. Two reasons:

1) That is a butt load of money for just two classes. Cheaper than any other school I've gone to in the last four years, but then...I've never paid with a check before either. It just seems like more when you know it's coming out of your account in 1-3 business days. Ugh.

2) I walked onto campus, and it's actually, like, a college campus. Like...real. Not at all like Kaplan. That's not a REAL real college. But this one...there were people studying outside of the bookstore at tables together.

3) I just took a huge step. Guys...I'm going to be a doctor. What in the world am I thinking?

4) I may be out of my mind, but I'm excited about it. And the remedy for the out-of-mindness is listening to Snow Patrol while OCD cleaning my room and doing laundry at midnight. Yeah...

Questions for God

So I read most of these in a book ("A Little Bit Wicked: Life, Love and Faith in Stages" by Kristin Chenoweth) and they made me laugh. And I don't feel like getting all deep and philisophical (that's spelled wrong...) to continue with the song lyrics tonight because I'm inexplicably tired (took a kick-butt 2 hours nap today. It was heavenly.) It sounds like something me and Jenny would make a list of. It's a list of questions to ask God when I meet Him: (I'm leaving some of hers out and adding some of my own. Feel free to comment with your own.)

1) Who killed JonBenet? And does she pretty much own the pageant circuit up here?

2) Did Marilyn kill herself or was it a Kennedy?

3) Did Lee Harvey Oswald really act alone?

4) Why is forgiveness so dang hard?

5) Why is slapstick so dang funny?

6) Who is the sadistic genius behind cellulite? Lord, please tell me you did not have anything to do with that.

7) What if you made it so that hate would cause hemorrhoids? Just an idea.

8) Did you really know that was going to happen? Did it make you laugh when you thought of that?

9) Why are stupid people so bound and determined to break into my Scooters? Twice in one weekend? Seriously?? Tell me the truth...was it someone from Starbucks? Or maybe some disgruntled Crane coffee peeps? (haha...at first I accidentally typed poops. shut up...I live with 3 young children. And Tim. And Mindy, for that matter. I think poop is funny now. And I am not ashamed.)

toooooo tired to finish....more to come. Or some more lyric interpretation tomorrow. whatev.

Peace